Saturday, November 17, 2012

Cyber-Friends

I have made friendships that existed exclusively in cyberspace. The major difference between them and face to face relationships is that they really aren’t substantial. That’s not to say that there isn’t a certain level of deep intimacy, because there is, but that intimacy is false in a way. In an online friendship or relationship there are two ways that you can approach it. One is to be honest about yourself and your personality, the other is to have a persona that isn’t really you. In both cases you have the ability to interact with people at a level that, due to anonymity, more vulnerable than you might experience in person.

That is unfortunately also the problem with those relationships. Without meeting face to face, you don’t have the same kind of investment in the friendship that you would with someone that you can actually spend time with outside of the comfort of the virtual world. Online I have access to millions of people who share interests with me to some varying degree. I don’t necessarily need to be your friend online, because I can just as easily go find someone else who will be just as interesting and accepting as you. For that reason, none of my online relationships have lasted without me being able to actually meet the person on the other side of the screen. That being said, both my best friend and my wife are the result of online friendships that became face to face friendships.

1 comment:

  1. i never really thought about how you can be someone your not in a cyber relationship, although its really common sense. that could be a good thing if you are wanting to start over and make new friends, cyber people dont know you and you can be anyone you want. i agree that cyber relationships also dwell out if you can not meet face to face. meeting face to face makes the relationship much more valuable

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